Engaged to my wonderful wife, Carol, 29 years ago tomorrow!

Letters

Mailed letter to David Doss today on the occasion of the death of his mother.

ALS

Gave Tracy Hughes $50 for walk to defeat ALS. Her brother died of the disease.

Helped christopher find his vin

Helped christopher find his vin number as he heads back to school for his first day of class. He is commuting this year.

On Becoming a Christian

I hated public speaking. The very thought of it turned by stomach to mush. In times past, I was made to speak publicly on various occasions, and each time, I became physically sick at the very thought of it.

In college, I had my first speech class, which of course, was mandatory for me to take, else I would certainly have forgone the pleasure. I use to tell my friends that it was a good thing I was only required to take one, for if two had been demanded, I never would have graduated. I simply would not have taken that course again, for any bribe, under any circumstances, or for any prize.

Now mind you, I have never had the experience of one man I once heard of who, upon standing before the church having been called on to give his testimony, went totally and absolutely blank when his eyes settled upon the congregation.

At first, there had seemed to be some hope for him as he walked forward – slowly yes, but somehow determinedly. As he reached the podium and turned to face the congregation, everyone noticed that his eyes were either closed, or simply looking downward to notes of some kind. (The congregation always looks to see if notes are used.) It was then, at this very moment, that there was observed a movement in his jaw.

At that moment, when his eyelids raised and his dark brown eyes became visible, those eyes suddenly froze into what can only be described as a "death stare." His entire body turned absolutely to rock hard stone, with one exception. Almost as if it were a flag being lowered to half mast to signify someone had died, so his lower jaw began, ever so slowly, to lower.

It was later the object of much talk among the patriarchs of the church as to the final position of the man's lower jaw, and the resultant opening of the man's mouth. Each of the older men discussing this sight would even make guesses as to the size of various objects which, if pitch from the fourth pew, could have cleanly cleared his teeth.

After several minutes had passed and it became obvious to everyone that this man was not going to improve his condition, some of the church leaders rose, took him by the hands and led him back to his seat. Upon being back in his favorite place on the pew, he quickly recovered. Everyone looked glad to see that this strange condition left no apparent permanent effects.

No, I was not this man. But I believe it to be a true story. It is certainly the way most of the people who have a fear of public speaking view happening to themselves sooner or later. I did. And that's why I vowed I would never again take another speech class, or do any kind of public speaking for as long as I lived.

So why have I been teaching a Sunday School class for couples year in and year out? Why did I, for the better part of a year, fill in as supply pastor in a small Presbyterian church at their request, when I have no training as a pastor. I can honestly say before the Lord that I speak in his name with utter dependency on him. I do not seek, and would simply laugh at the suggestion that I have any confidence in myself in being witness to his name.

I joined a small Presbyterian church at the age of 11. If someone had asked me if I believed in Jesus, I would have said "yes." If someone would have asked if I believed God raised him from the dead, I would have said "yes." But the simple truth of the matter was, over the next ten years of my life, the fact that I believed these things made no difference in my life -- not in what I did and not in what I said.

And the reason it made no difference was because they were facts and nothing else. I believed in Jesus the way I believe in Thomas Jefferson and Abraham Lincoln. They lived and they did things, and I believe the history I read and heard about these men. In the same way, I believed what I read and was told about Jesus and what he said and did.

A medical researcher may know everything to know about the life saving property of insulin. But his knowledge by itself will not keep him alive if he's also a diabetic. He must take the insulin itself into his body. Another diabetic patient may know nothing at all about the chemical composition or molecular structure of insulin. All he knows is that he needs to receive it to live.

An intellectual knowledge of Jesus Christ is not enough. The scripture tells us that Satan and his demons have that. It certainly was not enough to cause me to stand for Jesus. It was not enough to cause a fundamental change in my life. Just knowing about Jesus made no real difference to me.

And then, in 1972 I read a book by Hal Lindsey. The title of the book is "The Late, Great, Planet Earth." The Holy Spirit used that book to speak to me. It told me of a God who did not just wind the world up like a top and released it to spin to its own conclusion. God, as pictured in this book and in Revelation, is the God who has a plan.

His love for us is so great, he allowed his Son to become the sinless sacrifice for us. Even while sin stormed our minds and gave flight to our hands and thoughts, he died our deserved death. And when I receive him, and totally trust and depend on only him as my righteousness, he places me into his eternal family, to share life with him for eternity.

During the reading of that book, it started to become clear as He also led me to read his Word very intently for many months. His Word finally brought me to the foot of the cross and I knelt and received Jesus as the Savior and Lord of my life. He adopted me into his own family and has made me his child forever.

And now, whenever I am called on to speak about my Savior, I just remember what he has done for me, and I have courage.

Ines C. Sheppard - My Mother

My mother, Inez (known by friends and family as Ines) Ulalah Chilton Sheppard, was born to Albert and Jettie Chilton on Thursday, February 18th, 1909 in Stokes County, North Carolina.

Mama, as my sisters and I always called her, was the youngest of seven children. It has always been an interesting fact to me that my mother, the youngest of seven, married my father who was the oldest of seven, and that the oldest of my mother's sisters eventually became the mother-in-law to the youngest of my father's brothers. In fact, several of my aunts are also my first cousins through intermarriage between these two families.

I have never been able to either spell or pronounce Mama's middle name, Ulalah. I have no idea how her parents ever came by such a name, my having heard it used by no one else even in the farming community in which we all grew up. I usually have avoided using it, like my own middle name, Leake. In fact, for some period of time when I was young I substituted for my middle name "Lee" instead, especially when a girl asked what my middle initial stood for. I never knew Mama to do that about her middle name, but then again being a married woman she had Chilton to fall back on.

Mama was spoiled by her parents. I believe that she freely admitted this. She was probably very cute, very lovable, and considered special in the eyes of her aging parents having come along late in life. All her childhood memories from what I have been told were happy ones.

One favorite memory of hers was the time when she and her father took a train north to visit relatives. It lasted a week or more I suppose and whenever she remembers it, she always does so with a smile of great contentment and a definite sparkle in her eye. Invariably, she accompanies the story with the remark that her father was the very best dad ever. He apparently loved her very much and treated her like a princess.

Mama met her future husband, my father, when they were in elementary school. The school house was I believe in Asbury and was a one-room affair serving a variety of grades. My parents liked each other early and never looked back. When they were old enough to date, they did; and when they were old enough to marry, they did -- on Monday, December 26th, 1927. They were the very best of friends and lovers until by father died in 1990.

Daddy decided to try his new barber license in the big city of Winston-Salem and so they moved there into a small apartment. In the same apartment building was a German family I believe who often invited my parents to delicious dinners of rich foods. Mama was rather slim when she married but probably began to add a few pounds during their stay in Winston.

Mama probably did little except stay around the apartment all day while Daddy went to work. With many opportunities for boredom, having grown up very close to her large family (and pampered by them), I expect that she began to work on Daddy to take her back to the farm. Her brother Jim also helped to move events along since he was also close to his sister.

In time they arranged to purchase 42 acres of the family farm from her brother Floyd Chilton. There was a house on the property too, not very nice but livable. They moved into this house, planted a crop of tobacco and in the fall, made less money than they spent. Nevertheless, together my parents began to carve out a living on that piece of land which supported them for the remainder of their long lives.

Within a few years my oldest sister and their first child, Patsy, was born on Monday, December 28, 1931 and on that day, the young wife became a mother. Her second child, Phoebe, was born on Monday, January 4, 1937. (I also was born on Monday and my parents married on Monday.)

My mother suffered a bout of depression during the period of time just prior to my birth, spending a lot of time crying. She suffered two miscarriages between the births of Phoebe and me which may have contributed to the ailment. My sisters have remarked that they frequently would have to leave the house just to relieve themselves of the emotional strain of being around her. They comment very favorably on Daddy's kindness and patience during this time, as all other times. Finally, she was admitted to the Baptist Hospital where she underwent shock therapy in an attempt to snap her back to normality. She was in a room in the psychiatric wing with another patient who was in worse condition than she. The totality of the experience served to improve her condition considerably.

The storm clouds lifted just prior to my birth and my mother returned to her old self. Being born to my mother at the age of 42 after such a dark period in her life and being her only son, I suspect, as my sisters have hinted, that I may have received some extra special treatment from her, but I know she loved us all the same as have been evidenced by a lifetime of activities toward all her family.

My memories regarding my mother is of unbroken contentment and happiness. In this day of so many broken families, I wish everyone could experience what I did.

I lived within the same house with my parents from birth until I moved to Winston-Salem at the age of 29. Throughout all those years and for all the years afterwards, I always felt wanted, appreciated, and loved. I was the object of her compassion and tenderness. I, along with the rest of the family, was served magnificient country meals which to the day I die will bring a smile to my lips at the quality and quantity. I was always beaconed to eat and to eat plenty. In the country it was a sign of hospitality to provide food for others and my mother always did it in a grand way.

I always felt welcome and at peace, and never once in my life did I sense that I was an inconvience to her or her lifestyle for even a moment. I sometimes wonder how children feel when, with today's busy parents, kids are often deposited with relatives or day care centers or multi-week summer camps or hotel playrooms, etc. while the parents go off to their own activities. I was never made to feel insecure by my parents, and never made to feel that I was cramping their lifestyles. They treated me, and I'm sure my sisters as well, as special gifts from God. I would not begin to know how to repay them for this priceless feeling they have left with me, except to emulate it with my own children in some worthy measure.

When I was around ten years old, my mother and I would often take day trips to wonderful places on Saturday while my father worked in Stuart, VA as a barber. One frequent destination was Mt. Airy. For a country boy this was a wonderful experience which presented all manner of activities, especially a movie theater. Daddy would typically drive us up in the early morning on his way to work. He would then swing back by about 5pm to pick us up.

Besides the movie theater, there was a large drugstore that had a diner near the back. Metal stools, a lot of them, with vinyl cushions beaconed me to mount one and spin back and forth. There were glass cases of pies on the counter, along with large glass containers of sugar with metal tops with a flipper pourer. Matching salt and pepper shakers and paper napkin dispensers added to the excitement and anticipation.

For whatever reason, I ordered the same thing every time: a toasted cheese sandwich. I rarely ate toasted cheese sandwiches at home and didn't even know how one would go about making such a thing. But here, they had the equipment and the people whose job it was to make them perfectly. Plus, there were the bonuses which could not be usually assembled at home.

The white bread was buttered, cheese was added, perhaps even mayonnaise, and the whole thing was placed onto an aluminum foil toaster bed and the similarly covered lid was pulled down to begin the process. While that part of the meal was toasting, a clean plate was retrieved from a stack of clean plates and placed onto the worktable. The person reached into a gigantic bag of potato chips and extracted a large handful. Next a serving-size spoon or fork was used to dip into a mammoth pickle jar to fetch a bunch of sliced bread and butter pickles. These items were carefully arranged on the plate leaving just enough room for the cheese sandwich. The toaster lid was lifted revealing a golden brown product which then was removed and sliced diagonally and placed perfectly onto the plate. The plate was set before me along with a fountain Coke. The moment could not have been improved upon.

Mama worked in the fields alongside the other family members. As lunchtime neared she would quit the fields and head to the kitchen to begin to prepare a large luncheon for her family and the other field hands. As a youngster I was always envious when she left while I still had to slap away tobacco bugs in the hot sun. Of course I knew nothing of hot stoves and steam and other such incidences of cooking, and so in my naivete, I was somewhat envious.

I cannot describe the shear pleasure of hearing the words from Daddy, "Dinner's ready!" On the farm, "lunch" was a city term and so the better term "dinner" was substituted. "Supper" was the evening meal. "Dinner" was probably more appropriate due to both the size and variety of the meal set before us.

The anticipation while we washed up was joyful. First we washed in kerosene to remove the tobacco gum, then in soap and water to remove the kerosene before sitting down to the table.

Spread out on the clean tablecloth before us were large colorful bowls of green beans, crowder peas, creamed corn or corn-on-the-cob, baked or fried apples, hot biscuits and cornbread, fresh butter, molasses, honey, and pear preserves. Waiting on a table nearby were hot cobbler pies of either peach, strawberry, or apple. To wash it all down was ice cold milk, buttermilk, tea, and coffee.

We all ate ravenously until we were full and well satisfied. The men then sat and rested while the women worked in the kitchen to begin the clean-up process. I expect that they sometimes rested at the same time the men did. It sounds unfair, and it was, but some justification was realized when the men went back into the hot sun and fields while the women (or just Mama if no other women were present) lingered behind in the coolness of the house. It didn't last of course as they joined the men later on.

My mother always insisted that her children attend the various family reunions which were held at several local churches. The two key ones were the Sheppard and Chilton reunions. The Sheppard Reunion was traditionally held at Asbury Presbyterian Church. The Chilton Reunion was held at the Friends Church in Westfield. These reunions, especially the Chilton reunion, harbored tables which were ladened with everything conceivable that was capable of holding fat or sugar. Every dish was heavy and delicious. There was laughter and sometimes singing and much talk. I always enjoyed having went and seldom looked forward to going. I think it was just the anticipation of having to endlessly repeat one's recent life to each and every person. As Mama loved to talk and hear talk, she of course loved these get-togethers. There was NO talk of not going in her presence.

Mama was very good at cooking, quilting, cleaning house, food preparation, asking people to stay and eat, and sad to see people leave after a visit, especially her children. She enjoyed being with people (especially of course Daddy and her children), going shopping, reunions, reading the newspaper (a habit she acquired from her father), watching TV, and talking over the phone with friends and relatives.

Can a Christian Grow Beyond the Need for Faith?

Can a Christian grow beyond the need for faith? Is faith merely and simply a product of a young believer? Some of my thoughts about this question.

Faith is an expression of spiritual awakening. It is hope in the exisstence of the God beyond sight. As God reveals himself via his Word, prayer, experience, events, the believer's faith is increasingly replaced by the reality of himself. Our faith is replaced by knowledge of the truth.

Members gather inside a classroom. The room is dark and one can touch others, feel their presence, and hear the mumbling of voices, but we cannot see. Among the sounds, we perceive that we hear the voice of the teacher but cannot quite decide. Someone asks us the challenging question, "Is our teach present?" Our belief must be relied on in the absence of assurance. It is the proper time for the class, it is reasonable to expect the teacher to be present; therefore, we will act and talk in a way that assumes that he is. The available evidence gives voice to our faith expression.

"Yes, I believe so."

The lights are gradually brought up. Out of the darkness, shapes begin to form and the teacher's familiar physical outline becomes more drawn. Our confidence in our answer is increased and our assurance grows and replaces that uncertain part of faith. Finally, the lights are on fully and we know for certain that, indeed, our teacher is present!

As our eyes received more light, as we acted on the light available to us along the way, our faith grew until replaced by "knowedge."

"Now, I know he is here with us."

Likewise, a Christian will eventually mature in faith beyond its need. I no longer "believe" that God exists or that Jesus is his Son. I know it as surely as I know my own wife and children. I do not have faith that God will do the right thing in any circumstance. I know he will. I no longer have fiath that God will bless me or disapline me whenever I need one or the other, I have complete confidence that he will.

Faith has been replaced by knowledge as a seed is replaced by its flower.

The only unkown is in God's future plans and individual works. The outcome of which lies not in the measure of faith as it does in the being to which the training faith illuminates. Waiting for the Christian beyond faith and hope is ultimate love and peace and joy. There is an eternal universe to be explored in this new land. A land delivered to us by the author and finisher of our faith, Jesus Christ.

Explorer, Saturn, ESV, Swimming

Fr Nov 10, 2006

Dropped off Christopher's Ford Explorer for ABS issue with rear back wheel.

Attended IBM's demo of their SOA (Service Oriented Architecture) offering. Better than Microsoft's earlier this week.

Reserved SAP class, SCM230 SNP, for Bruce Gavett.

Mo Nov 13, 2006

Met with Rick and Wendy to discuss interfaces (SOX) and the need to define a small number of procedures for handling errors. We use the Error Cockpit and SM35 specifically but need to determine if there are others. Diana will update the error portion of the SOX documentation and added the error handling procedure name to a column on the list of SAP interfaces she maintains. Lynne's team will write specific procedures - specifically for AR/AP as she feels the Journal error handling procedure is in good shape.

Awarded Diana a Round-of-Applause level WOW award ($100) for her work on SOX documentation.

Sent link for online Planview training to COE management.

Th Nov 16, 2006

In Fast Forward class this past Wed noon thru Friday. On vacation next week.

Mo Dec 4, 2006

Completed two monthly meetings with the Super Users last week where I reviewed the Oct 06 survey and 2007 plans.

Christopher having issues with roommates. Cable has been turned off due to non-payment.

We Dec 13, 2006

Sent out performance ratings recommendations for the Voyager technical team to COE management. Created Fast Forward meeting charter for Super User Network monthly meeting. For CR 2895 regarding Planview templates, spoke with Agustin and presented summary of recommended options to Bret - waiting on reply.

Christopher was late to an exam (Bible, his Professor had suddenly changed the exam from 9:30a to 8:00a). Carol and I prayed about this and when Christopher arrived in Charlotte (having been at home over the weekend), the professor gave him all the time he needed to complete! Great answer to prayer and praise to God. Christopher called this morning to say he had scored an unbelievable "B" in pre-Calculus - not his favorite subject! We both were very excited about this great accomplishment.

Amanda had a great swim meet last night - 5 events. She probably swam the best of this season. No more events until January.

Stephanie invited Ryan for supper the other night and it was good having him over. He is currently studying HVAC at Forsyth Tech and also working a Subway. Carol is encouraging her to bring him over more often so that we can get to know him better.

Carol and I purchased a new ESV Bible for her last weekend. CBC is transitioning to the version and plans to purchase pew Bibles in this translation for use beginning 2007. We noticed last Sunday that pastor had also purchased a new ESV Bible for himself and began using it from the pulpit.

This will be a busy weekend. We have a Christmas party at Don Lamonds house on Friday night; our Bible Fellowship class is having its Christmas Party on Saturday at the Magnolia Room at Wake Forest; and Beverly Amack, the swim coach, is having a Christmas gathering at her house this weekend also I think.

Th Dec 28, 2006

Saw the rings of Saturn through Stephanie's telescope for the first time tonight! Viewed the moon's craters last night.

The family enjoyed probably one of the best Christmas holidays ever. Both Ryan and Heather were able to spend some of the Christmas holidays with us. Also, George and Phyllis, though George was very weak, was able to come over Christmas Day afternoon to eat dinner with us.

Mo Jan 8, 2007

Jenny died today (see blog).

We Jan 17, 2007

I met this morning with Mitch Jones, Nick Gilley, and Agustin Fiorito to discuss Project Advance and its designated department # of 11231. The issue we needed to review was whether this was the proper dept# since the owner of this department is Doug Wilhelm. Based on the above comments that roll-up reporting is used primarily for the purposes of identifying business area demand, and that IT reporting is not being done to their understanding by dept# but rather by project, we agreed that we should continue with the existing dept#.

Also, since Voyager SAP covers a number of business areas, we should continue to select existing IT dept#'s based on the source of the demand for the project, e.g., 11226 "IT Demand Finance - Harrison Porter" should be used for finance-demanded projects, 11229 "IT Demand Sales - Rick Ford" should be used for sales-demanded projects, etc. Where there was demand from a number of business areas, we could either assign the primary business area, or the general 11202 "IT Business Solutions". This would be determined on a case-by-case basis.

Discussed becoming a Planview Power User with Agustin. We agreed to set up two work sessions a week with him over the next three weeks (also with Ed Bartz) to dive deep into Planview. I set up six 2-hr training sessions.

Met with Marsha Cagle and Nicki to discuss my new role of being a coordinator of facility moves - specifically how the movement and renaming of printers affects SAP. They agreed to send a list of printer moves and dates to me to review with the team.

RJR - Marchy Gras, Conference Swim Meet, Transports

Thursday.

Attended the IT Leadership meeting. Topics presented included an update of the IT year-end budget (we hit our marks), an overview of Planview v9 that will be implemented about mid-year with many new usability features, an new software package to manage forums (chat rooms) centered around various topics, and an update on the High Performance Culture's next event in March called "Marchy Gras!"

Left work earlier to attend Amanda's conference swim meet at American Hebrew Academy. Amanda was in two events - the 100 butterfly and 100 backstroke. She won her butterfly heat by 6 seconds better than her personal best! She also did a great job with the backstroke and again set a personal best time!

Returned back to work at 6:45p to do transports and finished up about 7:30p.

RJR - Birthdays, Super User Reviews, Prioritization

Attended breakfast this morning with Don Lamonds and all those in IT whose birthday is in February. Lots of people have birthdays this month! We paired up and shared some information about ourselves with our partner, who later introduced us to the group.

Added some columns to the Super Users list to associate business processes with each SU. I set up meetings today with each of the process team leads to assign a business process to each of their Super Users. Worked on this most of the day.

Attended the Supply Chain Operations (SCO) prioritization meeting. In general, there's not enough resources to complete items as quickly as the business desires. The process teams are trying to determine the extent of the gap so a request for additional resources can be made.